WHERE'S MY SECURITY BLANKET?

Winnicott

My attention has been drawn to Donald Winnicott, an English paediatrician and psychoanalyst. It is stated that he was especially influential in the field of object relations theory. He is best known for his ideas on the true self and false self, and the transitional object.

Bearing in mind the adage “Well, there’s this nurse…”, Winnicott’s observations and theories emanate from his preoccupation with paediatrics. His discourse is derived from that perspective - context. These observations, and in particular object relations theory, are of some importance and should be borne in mind when reading signs of identity. 

Winnicott thought that the "True Self" begins to develop in infancy, in the relationship between the baby and his/her primary caretaker (Winnicott typically refers to this person as "the mother"). One of the ways the mother helps the baby develop an authentic self is by responding in a welcoming and reassuring way to the baby's spontaneous feelings, expressions, and initiatives. In this way the baby develops a confidence that nothing bad happens when s/he expresses what s/he feels, so his/her feelings don't seem dangerous or problematic to him/her, and s/he doesn't have to put undue attention into controlling or avoiding them. S/he also gains a sense that s/he is real, that s/he exists and his/her feelings and actions have meaning.

Winnicott used the term "True Self" to describe a sense of self based on spontaneous authentic experience, a sense of "all-out personal aliveness" or "feeling real". The "False Self" was, for Winnicott, a defence designed to protect the True Self by hiding it. He thought that in health, a False Self was what allowed a person to present a "polite and mannered attitude" in public. But he saw more serious emotional problems in patients who seemed unable to feel spontaneous, alive or real to themselves in any part of their lives, yet managed to put on a successful "show of being real". Such patients suffered inwardly from a sense of being empty, dead or "phoney". True self is sometimes referred to as the "real self".

For Winnicott, in the False Self, 'Other people's expectations can become of overriding importance, overlaying or contradicting the original sense of self, the one connected to the very roots of one's being'. Winnicott thought that such an extreme kind of False Self began to develop in infancy, as a defence against an environment that felt unsafe or overwhelming because of a lack of reasonably attuned caregiving. Winnicott used the term "good enough" to refer to what he thought of as optimal parenting; he thought that babies need parents who are usually emotionally attuned and able to empathize with the baby, but not perfectly so. The danger is that 'through this False Self, the infant builds up a false set of relationships, and by means of introjections even attains a show of being real'. The result can be a 'child whose potential aliveness and creativity has gone unnoticed...concealing an empty, barren internal world behind a mask of independence'. Yet at the same time the 'Winnicottian False Self is the ultimate defence against the unthinkable "exploitation of the True Self, which would result in its annihilation"'.

By contrast, the True Self is rooted in, and '"does no more than collect together the details of the experience of aliveness" - this means the body's life-sustaining functions, "including the heart's action and breathing"'. Out of this the baby creates the experience of reality: a sense that '"Life is worth the trouble of living". In the baby's nonverbal gesture which '... expresses a spontaneous instinct', the true self potential can be communicated to, and affirmed by, the primary care giver.

'The False Self in its pathological guise prevents and inhibits what Winnicott calls the "spontaneous gesture" of the True Self. Compliance and imitation are the costly results'. Some would indeed consider that 'the idea of compliance is central to Winnicott's theory of the false self', and add, paradoxically, that 'concern for an object is easily a compliant act'. Where the mother is not responsive to the baby's spontaneity, where instead 'a mother's expectations are too insistent, they can eventually result in compliant behaviour and an impaired autonomy', as the baby has 'to manage a prematurely important object....The False Self enacts a kind of dissociated regard or recognition of the object; the object is taken seriously, is shown concern, but not by a person'.

Object relations theory describes the process of developing a psyche as one is growing up, in relation to others in the environment. Based on psychodynamic theory, the theory object relations suggests that people relate to others and situations in their adult lives as shaped by family experiences during infancy. For example, an adult who experienced neglect or abuse in infancy would expect similar behaviour from others who remind them of the neglectful or abusive person from their past (often a parent). These images of people and events turn into Objects in the subconscious that the person carries into adulthood, and are used by the subconscious to predict people's behaviour in their social relationships and interactions.

Internal objects are formed by the patterns emerging in one's repeated subjective experience of the caretaking environment which may or may not be accurate representations of the actual, external others. In the theory, Objects are usually internalized images of one's mother, father, or primary caregiver, although they could also consist of parts of a person, for instance an infant relating to the breast, or things in one's inner world (one's internalized image of others). Later experiences can reshape these early patterns, but Objects often continue to exert a strong influence throughout life. Objects are initially comprehended in the infant mind by their functions and are termed "part objects." The breast that feeds the hungry infant is the "good breast," while hungry infant that finds no breast is in relation to the "bad breast." With a "good enough" "facilitating environment" part object functions eventually transform into a comprehension of whole objects. This corresponds with the ability to tolerate ambiguity, to see that both the "good" and the "bad" breast are a part of the same mother figure.

A transitional object, comfort object, or security blanket is an item used to provide psychological comfort, especially in unusual or unique situations, or at bedtime for small children. Among toddlers, comfort objects may take the form of a blanket, a stuffed animal, or a favorite toy.